{"id":697,"date":"2025-09-17T17:33:04","date_gmt":"2025-09-17T17:33:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/counseling.baysideonline.com\/?p=697"},"modified":"2025-10-28T20:36:35","modified_gmt":"2025-10-28T20:36:35","slug":"happy-new-year-goodbye-to-the-old","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/counseling.baysideonline.com\/?p=697","title":{"rendered":"Happy New Year: Goodbye to the Old"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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Written By Amy Foraker, LPCC<\/em>

Happy New Year!\u00a0\u00a0Isn\u2019t that what we are supposed to proclaim at 12 am on January first?\u00a0\u00a0However, the proclamation includes the word \u201cNew\u201d, which often does not feel \u201cHappy.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0Wherever you find yourself this new year, let\u2019s take this moment to experience our feelings as they are and define what \u201cNew\u201d might mean for us this year.\u00a0

\u201cNew\u201d is uncomfortable.\u00a0\u00a0My family just purchased a new home.\u00a0\u00a0We are overwhelmed with gratitude and love for our new home, and yet our \u201cnew\u201d is uncomfortable.\u00a0\u00a0The upstairs\/downstairs is a challenge to navigate, we have no backyard and its muddy, we\u2019re constantly cleaning muddy cat paw prints off the flooring, and the list goes on\u2026\u00a0\u00a0If I\u2019m perfectly honest in many ways it would have been a lot more comfortable to just stay in the \u201cold\u201d place.\u00a0\u00a0

Additionally, \u201cnew\u201d and grief are partners.\u00a0\u00a0Beginning something new also means something else has ended.\u00a0\u00a0Furthermore, the ending might have been out of our control.\u00a0\u00a0For instance, \u201cnew\u201d holiday traditions often come after someone has passed away and its now impossible to continue as it was before.\u00a0\u00a0\u201cNew\u201d marriages often come after the grief of a death or divorce.\u00a0\u00a0\u201cNew\u201d jobs are often preceded by the loss of the old.\u00a0\u00a0Grief and gratitude, mourning and joy.

How do we enter this new year in the tension of saying goodbye to the old, while we step courageously into the new?\u00a0Let\u2019s look at three different ways together:

Acknowledge the endings.<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0Look back at this past year.\u00a0\u00a0This could be as simple as going through your camera roll on your phone.\u00a0\u00a0Remember the moments you determined to be memorable.\u00a0\u00a0Notice the changes you experienced because of the event or notice the change in the people in those pictures from the time you took them to now.\u00a0\u00a0These practices keep us in the present moment by noticing and honoring the passage of time.\u00a0\u00a0Maybe you want to create a timeline of events.\u00a0\u00a0Draw a line horizontally across a blank page.\u00a0\u00a0Using this line as a timeline for the past year make the top of the page the positive, fun, or easier events and make the bottom of your page the harder events of the year.\u00a0\u00a0You\u2019ve come through it all already so you might as well remember it all.\u00a0\u00a0
\u00a0
Grieve\u2026 or REJOICE from what we are moving away.<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0Maybe this new year has you moving out of a rental into home ownership like me. WOW!\u00a0\u00a0Even a simple toast and mention at a family meal will do the trick.\u00a0\u00a0Or maybe your oldest son turns 18 at the start of the new year (ok this might just be me), but for this kind of transition: write a poem, go through old pictures, have the family over for dinner and make a favorite meal.\u00a0\u00a0These are all rituals that allow grieving and rejoicing to flow.\u00a0\u00a0Maybe light a candle for someone you lost this past year, or\u00a0\u00a0pull out something that reminds you of them and keep it close by to ease you into a new year without them.\u00a0\u00a0
\u00a0
See.<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0The prophet Isaiah encourages the Israelites with the Lord\u2019s words saying, \u201cSee I am doing a new thing!\u00a0\u00a0Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0God tells his people that despite their circumstances, despite what they feel in the flesh as they walk through the wasteland, there is something deeper going on.\u00a0\u00a0Look and see<\/strong>, springs and streams are there to care for you.\u00a0\u00a0This \u201cnew\u201d thing resides only through the lens of the Spirit, not the flesh.\u00a0\u00a0In the flesh, wasteland, thirsty, hungry, afraid, but in the Spirit, see the springs of life.\u00a0\u00a0See your God caring for you.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0

It’s brave showing up in the present with all this uncomfortable \u201cnew.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0So, look to your left and right.\u00a0\u00a0Grab the hand of the person closest to you and realize that we are in this together.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Feel all of this new year just as it is, knowing that Emmanuel is still with us.\u00a0\u00a0He didn\u2019t leave when you took the Christmas tree down.\u00a0\u00a0He is walking right into this new year with you.\u00a0\u00a0_______\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0(fill in the blank) New Year, from all of us at Bayside Counseling Center.\u00a0<\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n
\"\"<\/figure><\/div><\/div>

Amy Foraker<\/h2>

Staff Therapist & Clinical Supervisor<\/em><\/p>

Amy completed her graduate education at Colorado Christian University in 2017 and completed her training at Bayside Counseling Center. She has a background in Trauma Informed Therapy from the Allender Center and enjoys teaching classes in community mental health outpatient facilities. \u00a0<\/div>
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