| Written By Amy Foraker, LPCC Recently, my husband and I went on a little weekend getaway to the Mendocino Coast in Northern California. Both of us being from California, we are fully aware when traveling to the coast in mid-March that we take the risk of enjoying the ocean at its wildest. The wind whipping the coastline, coating the shore with thick foam, and big waves pounding the rocky coastline. Along with all this wild beauty though, comes the wind and rain on the windy coastal roads with the possibility of rockslides. Drive slowly, stay in the middle of the road as much as you can, and grip that steering wheel. It is a wild and rural area; the roads often do not have guardrails. The lack of guardrails gets your heart pounding, arriving at your destination with sweaty hands and brow. Guardrails on a windy road are boundaries, keeping you from careening off the side of road onto the rocks below. And on a windy, rainy day, we are grateful for the boundaries. In other areas of our life though we struggle with boundaries. “What do you mean I can’t go there? Do that? Say that?” Boundaries in other forms can feel confining, and for many of us our natural response to confinement is to fight for what we think will be freedom. In Psalm 16:5-6, David writes about finding his satisfaction and freedom within the boundaries that God places around him. “Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance.” Throughout the Psalms, David often compares himself to those who chase money, follow other gods, and in general find happiness not following God’s plan for their lives. Here, he reminds himself that God’s boundaries are pleasant. Within the boundaries, David has all he needs. David writes about freedom within boundaries. The windy roads with no guardrails cause tension, anxiety, and rigidity. The same roads with boundaries allow for freedom from anxiety, a willingness to stay on our side of the road, and the opportunity to see the scenery around us. Boundaries in our relationship with God and others reflect this same reality. So, where we are feeling trapped, anxious, tense, and even bitter; take a moment to re-evaluate the boundary lines. Are they in pleasant places? If not, ask God, the original boundary setter, to help you see where the boundary lines are pleasant. READING SUGGESTIONS: – Boundaries by Henry Cloud and & John Townsend – Codependent No More by Melanie Beattie |
Amy Foraker
Staff Therapist & Clinical Supervisor
Amy completed her graduate education at Colorado Christian University in 2017 and completed her training at Bayside Counseling Center. She has a background in Trauma Informed Therapy from the Allender Center and enjoys teaching classes in community mental health outpatient facilities.